Saturday, February 4, 2012

At what point do we call Rick Santorum out of the closet?

Yesterday, Rick Santorum, in response to a gay republican man's inquiry about why he doesn't enjoy the same rights as heterosexuals who are allowed to marry said this:
SANTORUM: You’re not entitled “to special treatment under the law…[Marriage is] not a right, it’s something that has existed since the beginning of human history as an institution where men and women come together for the purposes of forming a natural relationship as God made it to be. And for the purposes of having children and continuing that civilization. It is an intrinsic good…And as a result of that, we extend a privilege. We extend certain privileges to people who do that because we want to encourage that behavior. [...] 
Two people who may like each other or may love each other who are same-sex, is that a special relationship? Yes it is, but it is not the same relationship that benefits society like a marriage between a man and a woman. (source: ThinkProgress)
Hey, I'm not gay. Definitely not gay.
I mean, do I look gay? See? SOOO not gay.
Repressed much? Repressed. Much.  Some argue that some or most people who are homophobic have repressed their own homosexuality. And it's pretty well known that some high-profile people who are vociferously anti-gay are, themselves, pretty freakin' gay--Senator Larry Craig. Evangelical Minister Ted Haggard come immediately to mind.  And don't get me started on the give and take of "sacraments" in the church. Of course, in our short-term memory culture, we um...crap. Where was I? Oh yeah, now I remember:

At what point do we call Rick Santorum out of the closet? 

Yeah, Rick Santorum has to be gay. Why? Well, he doesn't hate gay people as much as he probably hates himself for being gay. What's my evidence other than the fact that soooo many repressed gay men hate the fact that they're gay and then hate gay people because of it?


Gay much? Gay. Much. This is pretty basic stuff, as research conducted in 1996 confirms:

In 1996,  a controlled study of 64 heterosexual men (half said they were homophobic by experience, with self-reported orientation) at the University of Georgia found that men who were found to be homophobic (as measured by the Index of Homophobia) were considerably more likely to experience more erectile responses when exposed to homoerotic images than non-homophobic men.

Well, there's that, and the little known fact that Santorum's own former Chief of Staff is gayNot that there's' anything wrong with that. But why have a gay chief of staff when you hate the gay lifestyle and there are, presumably, plenty of non-gay chief of staff types available? Don't make no damn sense. Unless, you know, you're comfortable working many late nights with your right-hand man hovering over your shoulder working on speeches and, er, position papers and, um, stuff. For 10 years.

Yeah. It's time. Richard? Please, for the sake of everyone, please come clean. And if you can't do that, then please clean up the santorum after you're done, mmkay?


4 comments:

  1. Haha! You funny! I totally agree with you, man! Well-said!

    He'll NEVER come clean, though...
    "Forget it, Jake... it's... Santorum."

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  2. You wonder why his chief of staff is gay? Because conservative, Catholic, white males are some of the least racist, least bigoted, and least judgemental people in America. Rick picked a winner based on his knowledge and skills, and nothing else. And his TRUE friendship and professional relationship with his chief of staff is showing through the three big recent primary wins that are going to lead him to be your next president!

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    Replies
    1. Thanks for taking the time to comment! And for the nice chuckle--on all fronts.

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  3. Hilarious. I always kinda thought this myself. What an awful thought it is to think about the fact that he used to be my state's senator.

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