Wednesday, November 9, 2011

What Would Jesus Do? Let 'em Starve.

Michelle Antoinette
Or, at least, I'm pretty sure that's what Michelle Bachmann would say regarding people who are unemployed and struggling to feed their families. See, Bachmann knows that if someone is unemployed and hungry, it's due to some sort of character flaw or just because they're lazy. It makes me wonder: Do the nearly 15 million children living in poverty in the United States understand how incredibly lazy and shiftless they are? According to the National Center for Children in Poverty, the number of children living in poverty in the U.S. is up nearly 20 percent from 2000. According to the NCCP, nearly 5.5 million children live in families that have lost homes to foreclosures and 8 million children live in families where at least one parent has lost a job. Ah, facts and figures. Who needs 'em when you have all the answers in your guts? Your batshit crazy guts.

But I digress.

According to Think Progress, Bachmann promised to "significantly lower funding to social safety net programs" at a recent speech to the far right "Family Research Council." Bachmann, who has in the past hoped that the dire unemployment rate would help her presidential campaign, is a big fan of the FRC and its anti-everything-that-isn't-white-bread-and-god-fearin'-man-on-woman-filial-bliss-without-that-pesky-gangster government-interference view of the world.

So, in an effort to add to her already impressive highlight reel of nutball nonsense, she explains why we should starve the unemployed:


Jesus and Sandal Straps. So, what would Jesus do about the starving in our country? I think Michelle would probably have an answer similar to this: "Hey, ya know, Jesus would have stood firm on this, and although he didn't have boots and such, he knew that it was all about lacing up your sandals and whatnot. I think Jesus would say, 'Hey, I have a message for you lazies out there: You don't lace up your sandals and get to work, you don't get loaves and fish, and that's the bottom line!' and so, yeah, no nonsense from the Lord our God on that front."

1 comment:

  1. There are many days when I desperately wish for the US to become two separate countries. One for them and another for us. They can keep the name.

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